How Can You Tell She's a Lesbian

From Alison Bechdel

First scan her carefully for any obvious signs
Labrys jewlery
Tatoos of women`s names
Wallet in hip pocket

If no physical clues are evident, next you must scrutinize her behaviour
Does she make tampon jokes
Get calls only from women
Change the subject when conversations get touchy?
Yeah, the diaphrams inconvenient, but I kept forgetting to
take the pill. Ya can`t win. What do you use Sarah?

My goodness! A rare spotted malasian mango moth! And at
this time of the month

If the answer to any of these is YES chances are she`s one of us. But none
of this evidence is conclusive for proof, you must proceed to the next
step; judicious but leading remarks...
That`s a lovely LAVENDER sweatshirt...LAVENDER is my
favorite color, it`s so Festive and GAY!
wink wink nudge nudge

Finally if none of these methods are getting you anywhere, try asking her,
already!
Are you a lesbian?
Of course, aren`t you?